Not-to-be-taken risk

This morning i woke up late- Service starts at 11am and I woke up at 10.15am.

Seems like I will have sufficient time to prepare, huh? With the Sunday traffic...

I didn't know what to wear... Bad hair day... Stomach ache... (ops...)

So I went out at 11am.

On a usual Sunday, it takes about 20 minutes to reach church, despite my tortoise driving skill.

But... this morning someone buat pandai, took another road instead of the usual one she uses, and took ONE wrong turning, and that's it... I reached church at 11.45am...



This just proves one point-






I should remain a risk-averse person. Period.

Time for Miracles

It's late at night and I can't sleep, missing you just runs too deep...
Oh I can't breathe thinking of your smile.

Every kiss I can't forget, this aching heart ain't broken yet,
Oh God I wish I could make you see...

Cuz I know this flame isn't dying, so nothing can stop me from trying...

Baby you know that,
Maybe it's time for miracles, cause I ain't giving up on love.

You know that, maybe it's time for miracles,
Cause I ain't giving up on love- No I ain't giving up on us...

I just wanna be with you cause living is so hard to do,
When all I know is trapped inside your eyes.
The future I cannot forget, this aching heart ain't broken yet,
Oh God I wish I could make you see...
Cuz I know this flame isn't dying, so nothing can stop me from trying.

Baby you know that maybe it's time for miracles,
Cuz I ain't giving up on love...
You know that maybe it's time for miracles,
Cuz I ain't giving up on love... No I ain't giving up on us.

Baby can you feel it?
You know I can hear it,
So can you feel me feel you?
You know it's time....

Baby you know that maybe it's time for miracles,
Cuz I ain't giving up on love.
You know that maybe it's time for miracles,
Cuz I ain't giving up on love.
You know I ain't giving up on us,

You know I ain't giving up on... Oh I ain't giving up on us...




I'm not giving up on us.

The transition...

It's amazing how a few words can motivate you... merely a few words. I first felt motivated about my current job when my potential direct superior (now my direct superior) told me, "You've got a positive attitude, and I would like to arrange a second interview with you". A sentence which I will never forget, and believe it or not, motivated me for (at least) 4 months.

The first month after I got my job, she sets very high expectation and convinced me that I can do it. Oh yea I did felt pressured, but her motivation kept me going. To cut the story short, she kept motivating and helped me along the way, to achieve something in my career (to be more precise, the beginning of my career). I really thought I'd be pressured giler, but with the motivation and surrounded by very positive colleagues, I felt so blessed and thank Him for this.

Why am I sharing this random story? I'm just feeling thankful and blessed as I was never the favourite girl- I wasn't the teacher's pet, I wasn't a student whom a male teacher would have a crush on (:p), I always had to deal with tough/strict superior (even during internship), and I was always jealous with those who have very loving/penyayang superior. I never had a comfortable life back then- but everything made me a stronger person. I believe and is still believing that everything happens for a reason, and God has made His plan for all of us. I will stay strong (even after getting scolded teruk-ly by an Indian lady), and I shall prove that Chin Mei Lee has the potential to achieve something in life. Yes, I can.

Panic-nya aku

2 months back I was required to accomplish a task.

Due to time constraint, I completed the task using short cut/dirty trick/curi tulang trick.

This month, I have to continue from what I have done in that particular task.

As expected, I probably have to re-do everything because of my irresponsible attitude.




I should really start fixing this problem. Aih.

For 4 months

... I've gone MIA. All of the sudden I don't know how to write anymore. But many things are going through my mind lately. Don't even know which one to start with.

Done something silly with someone today. Think "someone" would know what I'm talking about. It was an unforgettable and yet hillarious experience which I think I will never forget. THANKS! :)

Have been mentally exhausted lately, trying to figure out what I have done wrong. I realised I got tired of having to take the initiative to apologise and to find out what the problem is. At the end of the day, it wouldn't last and even if it does, it won't be the same anymore. Despite how much I appreciated (and still appreciate) the friendship, my only hope is to obtain honesty and sincerity. I never stopped hoping and waiting for someone to answer my unanswered questions- I guess I'm beginning to give up. A friendship is extremely fragile, that's all I can say...

I've been doing many things which are not supposed to be done... Sometimes it's weird knowing what you are doing at that very moment is wrong, and will definitely hurt one party, and yet you still do it. It's like sin to the power of two. Should you listen to your heart, or your mind? If you listen to your mind, you'll be stuck in your current situation forever; and you listen to your heart, the consequences might be unbearable. I constantly remind myself to do the right thing, and yet it seems like the most difficult thing in the world to do. I hate myself for being so irrational and inconsiderate, I really do. I'm stuck here, with no where to go, no sense of direction, and hurting others... and probably myself in the end.

I can proudly announce that

I hate people who is fucking busybody.

seriously

what is the point of being friends now, knowing that there is a possibility of not talking to each other one day?

what is the point of caring about your family so much when they are not doing the same?

what is the point of trying so hard to drive carefully, and still could not avoid accidents?

what is the point of trying to lie to your relatives about whether you are going travelling or not?

what is the point of waiting when there are so much pain, patience and tears involved?

what is the point of trying to be nice to everyone when they don't appreciate what you're doing?

what is the point of trying your best in everything you do, but still don't managed to achieve what you want?

what's the point?
tell me, what is the point?




it's just pointless.